What I think as I rake leaves in my front yard.

This is kind of fun and relaxing.

This sucks.

I should have a really pretentious European party.  We can eat brie and drink wine. We can have pretentious drinking games... like... watching CNN and drinking every time they show a poor person.  No.  Watching Planet Green network and drinking every time they show a compact fluorescent light bulb, compost, Whole Foods, rain collection barrels, solar panels; or anytime someone mentions carbon footprint, Energy Star Appliances, green, or how being green is sooo 'easy' (plus one drink for the word 'green').

Hmm... I need to compost these leaves... it really is quite easy.

I'VE GOT BLISTERS ON ME FINGERS!

I need a band aid.

My lawn needs mowed... I'll do it tomorrow.

This really sucks.

I'm thirsty.

Wait... My shop vac has a detachable blower...  Why am I using a rake when I could be using a blower?

Wow, this blower really doesn't work very well.  What a waste of time.

My lawn actually looks worse now. . . crap.

I'm hungry.