Things my cat will eat, in order of preference.

Things my cat will eat (in order of preference).

1. Plastic bags

2. Plastic, other

3. Houseplants

4. Toilet paper rolls, full

5. My MacBook*

6. My calves, when I first wake up (the earlier, the better)

7. Important bills/tax documents

8. Toilet paper rolls, bare

9. Paper, miscellaneous

10. Rice flakes cereal

11. Bugs, spiders, spiderwebs**

12. Cardboard boxes

13. Miniature Transformers action figures

14. That overpriced pet grass that supposedly will keep cats from eating houseplants

15. Anything I'm eating

16. Cat food

*Includes MacBook magnetic power cord.

**Unless I actually want him to eat a spider.